We’re approaching two years now. From when the love of my life and I said our vows and were pronounced husband and wife. Wow! How quickly those years have gone by. During our pre-marital counseling our Pastor told us that through marriage God would challenge us. He would show us things deep in our hearts that needed to change. Things that we would never have gotten to without a husband and wife relationship. I definitely found this to be the truth, as God taught me what love really is.
Blockbuster movies like to show all the "feels" in love movies. We eat it up! We think, “That’s what love in my life should look like”, but the Bible tells a different story. In Galatians Paul lists the fruit of the spirit, starting with love. I believe so purposefully. Love encompasses all the following. The following eight terms could describe what love in action looks like. The ultimate character element that defines our relationships (whether in marriage or out) is love.
The most detailed description of love comes from 1 Corinthians 13.
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.
Here the author Paul shows us that you could have great speaking abilities, but if you don’t have love it’s empty noise. You could have the brightest mind in the universe, but without love it’s worthless. Faith in God big enough to move mountains, but without love it’s insignificant. You could give all that you have to others, but without love there is no gain.
So we know love is quite the big deal, but to most people love it quite the ambiguous word. If you were asked to give a direct definition as to what love is would you have a clear answer? In context to our relationships how can anyone know that they are in love, sharing love, or being loved if there is no clear explanation? But there is a clear answer as we continue reading!
4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 8 Love never fails…
One of the most defining moments of our pre-marital counseling was a complete breakdown of 1 Corinthians 13:4-8. A classic passage read at weddings. It’s easy to read through saying “Love is this, and love is that.” But to live it out in action is so much more difficult. By taking the time to really look at each attribute of love it helped me to see my weaknesses. It showed me what attributes of love I suffered in. By pin pointing my weak spots, I am able to practice them day by day in loving my wife.
The biggest calling in my life, beyond Aloha Ke Akua Clothing Company. Far greater than even my ministry in the church. It so love my wife as Christ loved the church.
Ephesians 5:25 states,
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her
It’s a enormous scary calling. How can I ever follow in the footsteps of God? How can I measure up to that depth of love?
I heard a great illustration once of the old man on the beach. Often he would see Fathers and sons walking down the beach and the children trying their best to step in their Father’s footsteps. With the Father taking normal strides and the child too small, he would see the children trip and fall as they did their best to stay within the footsteps of their Father. But… one day this old man noticed something different. Way down the beach, just barely in vision, he saw a very young child easily stepping in the Fathers footsteps. He continued to watch puzzled as the child briskly stepped in the imprints left by his Father. As the child and Father got closer he realized the reason why the child was able to step in the footprints so easily. The Father was taking very small steps. He was constantly looking behind to ensure his son was striding with ease. When his son started to fall, the Father would grab a hold of him, and help him carry on.
I can love my wife as Christ loved the church. I will learn to love my wife better and better, by following in His footsteps. Love is not a Hollywood movie feeling. Love is not ambiguous. Love is action. You don’t find love or fall into it, you work on it and build it. It’s small steps we take daily, and clearly defined by the Bible. I may stumble with a harsh word or an uncompassionate heart, but I pray that God grabs a hold of me. Lord help me in my mission of learning to love!
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. God Bless!